Using writing, and meditation, and ice cream, and reading, and dreams,

and a whole lot of other tools to rediscover who I am,

after six years living with a man with OCPD.

Monday, January 28, 2013

What Now, Brown Cow?

Now that we've finished Too Perfect, what's up next?

For me, perhaps, a bit of a break for a few weeks. Since the death of my beautiful friend Sidney in October, I have not only been struggling with grief and emotional pain, but also with severe physical pain.  Recently, after various exams, x-rays, MRI's,and other tests, I've been diagnosed with "frozen shoulder."

Fire shoulder might be a better description, of the way it feels. The treatment includes a cortisone shot (got it) and physical therapy. I'm also getting aquatic therapy, and it is improving, if more slowly than I might wish.

Note to self - there is a reason they tell you to pull the belt on the flotation belt tightly. Because it bugs when the thing rides up to just under your armpits.

It is also recommended that I stay away from the keyboard, as much as possible. So, while I'm not abandoning this blog, I may take some time off (or, depending on whether the Muse is jabbing me in the back, I may not).

As far as upcoming book reviews and discussion, the book that got the most votes in our survey was Lundy Bancroft's Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry & Controlling Men.

From the Book Description:

"He doesn't mean to hurt me-he just loses control."
"He can be sweet and gentle."
"He's scared me a few times, but he never hurts the children-he's a great father."
"He's had a really hard life..."

Women in abusive relationships tell themselves these things every day. Now they can see inside the minds of angry and controlling men-and change their own lives. In this groundbreaking book, a counselor shows how to improve, survive, or leave an abusive relationship, with:

€ The early warning signs
€ Nine abusive personality types
€ How to tell if an abuser can change, is changing, or ever will
€ The role of drugs and alcohol
€ What can be fixed, and what can't
€ How to leave a relationship safely

Please, buy your own copy of the book  - put a book cover on it, if you must for your own safety, and tell your husband you're reading 50 Shades of Grey.  Get it on an e-reader.  If reading is difficult for you, get the audio version. Check it out from your library.  (Did you know you can also get e-books from the library?)

Let's read and discuss it together. I would also add - even if your angry and controlling person is female, there are many, many insights in this book that will be valuable to you.

Now off to make sure I have my towel and swimsuit. Hoo-boy, I am very grateful the water therapy ain't being videotaped, because I look like a dying whale thrashing around in the pool.

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